iris west-allen (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bloggings) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
crimson_graces2015-04-26 04:41 pm
bloggings) wrote in crimson_graces2015-04-26 04:41 pm
[closed to speedsters] psl. i'm the fastest woman alive
[Iris remembers being in the library when the particle accelerator exploded. She had another thirty pages to go on her dissertation and she was about to text Barry about how much she hated him for convincing her to go back to school for the twelfth time that day because if he had gotten the time right, then she wouldn't be working on her hated dissertation and stress eating, she would have been at STAR labs with Barry and a thousand other excited nerds but they got there too late, couldn't get in and so they went home because she was not going to stand outside in the rain--
-- and that's where it all goes dark.
Nine months later she wakes up in STAR labs, steals a sweatshirt and can run faster than people can blink.
The first person she tells, besides Dr. Wells and Caitlin and Cisco is her dad. Her dad who looks at her like he's terrified of losing his little girl like they both lost her mom, too young and too sudden and too violently. But then she tells him she wants to help people, that she wants to use this new speed to do good and not stand on the sidelines anymore, because she gets it. He didn't want her to be a cop to keep her safe but the universe has spoken and she's not going to ignore it this time. She's not a little girl, he can either support her or... well that's the only option she gives him. Support her or support her more.
The only thing they both seem to agree on immediately is: don't tell Barry right now. Not to keep him safe. Not to shield him. Not for any other reason besides what she can do, it should be impossible but it's not and that opens up a world of possibilities and neither of them want to get his hopes up before they know anything for sure. Because they've watched him struggle with his mom's murder and his dad's imprisonment for it for fifteen years and when they make the move to overturn the case to be foolproof, which is so the plan now because Iris puts two and two together and when Cisco tells her she's giving off yellow lightning when she runs all she can think of is eleven year old Barry asking if she thought he was crazy like everyone else at school.
No, Barry. Of course she didn't. Still doesn't. But she can't shake the nagging, bad feeling in her gut that she's not the only speedster in the world and that other one is what Barry saw that night and that it's not over just because Nora Allen is dead.
A run in with a man in a yellow suit who streaks red pretty much confirms that. But it's nice to know her instincts are still spot on.
Iris is not very good at secrets nor is she very subtle because Barry hears about her anyway, reads the reports online and the eyewitness accounts from crime scenes and he latches on hard. He talks about her all the time. He has theories and ideas and an excitement in his eyes that breaks her heart a little. Would he still be excited if he knew the truth? About her, about how she's kept a big secret from him for a few weeks now. Joe has to keep reminding her that she didn't want to get his hopes up, because if they're right then they can prove his dad is innocent finally but they have to toe the line carefully, play their cards right and Barry is even less subtle than she is.
But she seems to have decided she doesn't care about that anymore, after tonight. She needs Barry on their side, he's smart and knows more about his mom's murder than any of them. Or maybe she selfishly needs Barry to tell her that he doesn't blame her for anything. Or maybe she just likes the way he acts around her when she's under her mask. Like a star struck boy in love but one that also flirts back with her and says things her Barry would never say and she wants to feel appreciated right now. Whatever the reason, it has Iris turning off her ear piece in her suit after the man in yellow gets away, and she runs to the lab above the police station. She's bruised and hurting and wants nothing more than to shower and then sleep for a year but this needs to happen first.
Time to face the music.
Iris arrives in his lab in a familiar gust of wind, sending papers flying and oh god, ow, she needs to lean on this desk for a moment and catch her breath. The fight has taken more out of her than she thought apparently.]
-- and that's where it all goes dark.
Nine months later she wakes up in STAR labs, steals a sweatshirt and can run faster than people can blink.
The first person she tells, besides Dr. Wells and Caitlin and Cisco is her dad. Her dad who looks at her like he's terrified of losing his little girl like they both lost her mom, too young and too sudden and too violently. But then she tells him she wants to help people, that she wants to use this new speed to do good and not stand on the sidelines anymore, because she gets it. He didn't want her to be a cop to keep her safe but the universe has spoken and she's not going to ignore it this time. She's not a little girl, he can either support her or... well that's the only option she gives him. Support her or support her more.
The only thing they both seem to agree on immediately is: don't tell Barry right now. Not to keep him safe. Not to shield him. Not for any other reason besides what she can do, it should be impossible but it's not and that opens up a world of possibilities and neither of them want to get his hopes up before they know anything for sure. Because they've watched him struggle with his mom's murder and his dad's imprisonment for it for fifteen years and when they make the move to overturn the case to be foolproof, which is so the plan now because Iris puts two and two together and when Cisco tells her she's giving off yellow lightning when she runs all she can think of is eleven year old Barry asking if she thought he was crazy like everyone else at school.
No, Barry. Of course she didn't. Still doesn't. But she can't shake the nagging, bad feeling in her gut that she's not the only speedster in the world and that other one is what Barry saw that night and that it's not over just because Nora Allen is dead.
A run in with a man in a yellow suit who streaks red pretty much confirms that. But it's nice to know her instincts are still spot on.
Iris is not very good at secrets nor is she very subtle because Barry hears about her anyway, reads the reports online and the eyewitness accounts from crime scenes and he latches on hard. He talks about her all the time. He has theories and ideas and an excitement in his eyes that breaks her heart a little. Would he still be excited if he knew the truth? About her, about how she's kept a big secret from him for a few weeks now. Joe has to keep reminding her that she didn't want to get his hopes up, because if they're right then they can prove his dad is innocent finally but they have to toe the line carefully, play their cards right and Barry is even less subtle than she is.
But she seems to have decided she doesn't care about that anymore, after tonight. She needs Barry on their side, he's smart and knows more about his mom's murder than any of them. Or maybe she selfishly needs Barry to tell her that he doesn't blame her for anything. Or maybe she just likes the way he acts around her when she's under her mask. Like a star struck boy in love but one that also flirts back with her and says things her Barry would never say and she wants to feel appreciated right now. Whatever the reason, it has Iris turning off her ear piece in her suit after the man in yellow gets away, and she runs to the lab above the police station. She's bruised and hurting and wants nothing more than to shower and then sleep for a year but this needs to happen first.
Time to face the music.
Iris arrives in his lab in a familiar gust of wind, sending papers flying and oh god, ow, she needs to lean on this desk for a moment and catch her breath. The fight has taken more out of her than she thought apparently.]
no subject
because right now, it's hard not to be stuck on the other point here. he shakes his head, steals a brief glance up at her.]
I don't...
[understand. know how to live with that. and it's a good thing barry visited his dad just earlier today because he sure wouldn't know how to look at him now.
he could almost feel the same about iris, knowing it's her arch-enemy, apparently, knowing it's her connection to him that might've caused everything, except...he does know how. he knows how to love joe and be grateful to him, live in his house for years and call him his foster dad to other people, all while remembering joe's involvement in putting henry allen in prison. it makes him sick to think of iris that way, especially when he knows it's not her fault. she didn't ask for any of this any more than he did. she's never wanted to do any more than protect people, including him and his dad. secret identities or no, she's still the person who stayed his best friend despite everything, and he's still grateful.
but it's not that easy.]
And I...could lose my parents? [he knows she didn't make that call, and how unfair that is to ask — though the whole thing is unfair, start to finish. so he moves to stand, raising hands to take hers in his as he does.] No. I'm sorry. I'll help you — [gives her hands a squeeze] — whatever you need, you know that. Iris or the Flash.
[and then letting go of her hands.]
But not right now.
[right now? he could use some air.]
no subject
Because it is her fault. Because the man in yellow doesn't want to just kill her, he wants to tear everything she has apart first.]
Barry--[She's not even trying to hide the tears welling up in her eyes. Not because she wants to make him stay or make him pity her, but because his pain is as real to her as her own. For a moment she looks like she's going to push into him, hug him, make him stay with her but she doesn't. She just nods and drops her hands.]
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll go.
no subject
maybe he shouldn't be asking iris to go, knowing this guy's probably tried to kill him once already and is back in central city. but, honestly? barry wants to meet the man in yellow. he's been terrified of that very thing happening his whole life, but he's also wanted it, and in a crazy way he's more upset that this other speedster hasn't bothered coming back after him yet. barry doesn't want to hear about maybes or probablys from iris. he wants to ask the man himself what happened and why. why his mom; why him; why iris. why let his dad get stuck in prison for all these years, when it's iris he's after?
and can he be convinced to do something about it?
there are too many questions and no answers, not really. maybe iris is the one who can run faster than almost anyone else, but barry's always felt like he was being chased by something, and now it's closing in.
he exhales, runs both hands through his hair and down the back of his head, and nods without quite looking at her.]
Okay. Okay.
[don't apologize doesn't quite make its way aloud.]
no subject
Iris takes her time putting the mask back on, tucking her hair under the edges. When she's done, it's not Iris West standing there anymore but the Flash. The woman who can run faster than the speed of sound. The reason Barry lost his parents.
She opens her mouth like she's going to say something else but changes her mind before the words can come out. And then she takes off in a gust of wind, sending whatever papers are still loose flying, and maybe he'll notice. Feel the brush of someone wrapping their arms around him tight and brushing their lips against his forehead. Or he won't but she couldn't leave without doing it.]